Re: Listen to Women

Just want to say thanks to everyone for reading HOW Listen to Women. I’ve enjoyed reading the comments, for and against.

Perhaps sometime soon I’ll get time to address Lauren’s comment. It’s highly critical and I think she deserves an explanation. Fortunately I think I have one.

My favorite comment was from Lars:

The terminology here confuses me. We have this archetypical conversation:

A: I have problem X.

With the two possible answers

B1: You could solve that by Y.
B2: That must really make you feel Z.

I get that the message is that B2 is often the more appropriate answer, bizarre as it may seem to me. But I don’t understand why the B2 speaker is thought of as listening, while the B1 speaker is not. To device a solution to X, you clearly have to have heard the problem description. The response of someone who was REALLY not listening would perhaps be

B3: So what’s on TV?

I’m guessing this is s different usage of “listening” than I’m used to?

Again, thanks a million to all of you. It was an honor to host the discussion.

Explore posts in the same categories: General

2 Comments on “Re: Listen to Women”

  1. nashira Says:

    I’m new here, I enjoyed the post you refer to.

    I also enjoyed Lars answer, but that brings us back to clarifications: what we (women) expect from men, sometimes, is that they listen to us, not to our problems.

    The answer to the problem is to offer a solution. The answer to what we’re really saying (I’m angy, I’m embarrased, I’m sad) would be that of empathy: “I understand how you feel”. For sometimes, the solution someone offers us is not intended to solve a problem but to ventilate his ego (“I know what should be done”).

  2. Relsqui Says:

    The above is well said, although I don’t agree 100%.

    I left you a hideously long comment on the previous post, which (perhaps for that reason) was flagged as spam. I make no claims as to the significance of its content, but I assure you it was written by a human. ; )

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: